“People—they’re the worst.” That’s a famous Seinfeld line that Brian and I laugh over a lot. There’s also an old preacher joke—“The ministry would be great if it weren’t for the people.” People are everywhere—you can’t avoid them, although some people sure try!

I read something last week that I haven’t hardly stopped thinking about, an excerpt from a chapter of a book by an author I’ve never heard of, L.T. Jeyachandran. It’s part of a further unfolding of the word “community” that God has emphasized so strongly in our church, and it means so much more than hardly anyone understands.

“…Our response to the holiness of God is to reflect his character in our lives–in one phrase, the pursuit of holiness. In our endeavor in this direction, however, we need to be careful to note that what we have come to call personal holiness–what is inward–is only a potential that has to be constantly actualized in inter-personal relationships. The time I spend with God must enable me to relate to a world of people and things in the right way. In fact, I can be holy when I am by myself; it is when I come out of my room and meet the world of people and things that I run into serious problems! I am afraid that the emphasis on holiness that we often talk about is “my” preoccupation with “my” hands being clean and “my” conscience clear for their own sake, and that happens to be a pretty selfish motive. A selfish motive to be selfless, indeed! It would be almost as if Moses, on coming down from Mount Sinai, began to enjoy his shining face in a mirror!

The Ten Commandments that God gave to his people sum up his requirement in terms of relationships–with Him and with one another. The Old Testament also sums up the commandments as love relationships with God (Deuteronomy 6:4–5) and among his people (Leviticus 19:18). In other words, holiness by God’s own definition (Leviticus 19:2) is the relational commandments that comprise the rest of that chapter. Holiness is therefore not the stand-alone ascetic quality that is the hallmark of some Eastern religions but a community of people in right relationship to one another…”

Holiness—a community of people in right relationship to one another! In this privatized individualized American culture, that’s a novel concept. And the author nailed it—it’s so easy to spend a half hour in solitude, reading the Bible, and emerge feeling “holy”, but quite another thing to have to deal all day long with people who have different opinions, emphases, desires, and agendas than you do. We can develop a certain degree of tolerance, but how about learning to truly love them as ourselves? How about learning to put their needs, thoughts, wishes above our own? That’s holiness, and it doesn’t come easy or cheap. It comes from committing our lives not only to God but to His body, the church, and, like Jesus, humbling ourselves to the point of dying to ourselves.

That’s what it means to allow the CROSS to work in our lives—to die daily as we work our way through our responsibilities, through relationships, through hurt and misunderstandings. We must learn to walk in love and in wisdom, not simply to hurl ourselves down as doormats, but to learn to love with God-informed intelligence, to understand others, and to work for them also to become whole and well. We must appreciate that our perception of the way things are is not always the only truth, that sometimes our perceptions are skewed by all kinds of things–our own failings, weaknesses, hurts and sometimes just a simple failure to not be aware of all the facts. Life can be a MYSTERY, and we become ECLECTIC when we open ourselves up to all kinds of people, people with different backgrounds, families, different personality types. And when we are committed to walk in holiness in this new understanding, that it is not something simply between my God and myself, but includes all those around me, those that God identifies as the neighbors I need to love, my COMMUNITY, then we truly can become the family God has always longed for. And that’s the REVOLUTION He came to earth to start.

  • http://www.angiewashington.blogspot.com Angie Washington

    “God-informed intelligence”…

    This is a great phrase to help us remember that even in all our trying we often times assume incorrectly when striving to get along with other people. We must not forget to trust God to give us his intelligence; and then act on it.

    I also liked this one: “A selfish motive to be selfless, indeed!”

    Touché! :-) Let us put our mirrors down and live in community.

    Great post Peri.

  • Cathy

    I love the new site and what a great post !!!

  • Chris

    Love this new site, so clean and uncluttered. Your header is awesome- I want to go walking there!

  • sheila carpenter

    Fantastic writing. Really makes me think and brings me back to were I need to be. I agree with Chris about the header… I think it looks like a lovely serene place straight from “Chronicles”. Love the new site!

  • http://opm4dmasses.blogspot.com Shane Ogle

    Peri,

    I heard a story years ago (when I was first saved) – I suppose it’s true…

    There was pastor who was having a dificult time in his church. Church problems galore. He decided to give his best anyway — but to no avail.

    One Sunday — after a particularly grueling service — he waited anxiously for the congregants to leave. As the last family left — he waved them off with a smile…

    He locked the doors. Walked back into the Sanctuary and shouted at the top of his lungs, “LORD! I HATE THESE PEOPLE!”

    About that time — a little lady who had been silently praying at the front pew of the church — rose her head up, “Pastor? Is that you?”

    I love that statement in your blog, “Holiness – a community of people in right relationship with one another.” I think many ministers could learn that lesson again — and besides that many Christians (I would say just “people” in general — but I think it would only be a sincere “try” at “holiness/transendence). Good post — as always.

    God bless.

    Shane

  • John Thornton

    I really needed to read that, well said, thanks

  • Becky

    I love the idea that we are a community and we must serve as Jesus did. ‘To serve’ – very selfless. But if I am selfish and am still having trouble with forgiving myself, how do I begin to live the cross? It is almost as if I love others more than myself. I am not meaning to sound altruistic, but I have a hard time forgiving myself. And while I understand not doting on ourselves too much and putting others first, how can I be a good Christian if I can’t forgive myself for something I did? Can I still serve honestly and lovingly without that part taken care of? I know that God forgives me but I still let it haunt me.

  • Kimberly

    I have also found that life’s greatest lessons are found in relationships with people. I in the past remember telling God “If it wasn’t for ‘these people’ things would be alright”. (But I forget that I am one of “these People” to someone else. :)

    It doesn’t matter the type of relationship it is, how deep or how shallow, He still uses it to grow us up in Him. So no real holiness apart from people and no real growth without them either. Well at least not growth that has withstood a test.

  • Mariell Jones

    I love best the part of putting people’s needs, thoughts and wishes above our own, in a society driven by “look after number one — yourself!” Now, how to do this daily…! And how do we help each other with it?

  • http://www.xanga.com/l_nel Lesley Borger

    “Life can be a MYSTERY, and we become ECLECTIC when we open ourselves up to all kinds of people, people with different backgrounds, families, different personality types.”

    I think I’m beginning to see this more and more… great blog, I enjoyed reading!

  • Georgina Ridley-Smith

    Great book on this very topic is “How People Grow” by Cloud and Townsend. Really helped me accept all the ‘silly’ people at church. Here’s a quote from chapter 7; ‘Relationship with others is part of the created order. Independece from relationship is independence from God himself, for he is present in his Body; it is also independence from the way he designed for us to grow’

  • Susan B.

    This sentence caught my attention…”The time I spend with God must enable me to relate to a world of people and things in the right way.”

    It is how we relate to people that makes the different. If people are not on the same page, how can they communicate?

    Good Post! Thanks for sharing…

  • Christy

    I found you! I tried posting before, but??

    Anyway, great post! Oh help me God not to be a pharisee!

    I’ve been known to say that I was a great wife before I got married and an even better mother before I had kids, ha ha.

    Hey, wanted to tell you that I tried out the pilates and the kickboxing classes at AEC. Besides looking ridiculous, I’m loving it!

  • So Glad!

    So glad the Pastor does what He is called to do, You do what You are called to do, and the silent praying lady does what She is called to do… Thank God He does what only He can – truly love Us all unconditionally, and make Us All more like Him.

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